Reg(i)stry

Wedding registry is a funny thing idn't it? I mean, honestly, who the hell registers?

Emily and I are registered at Target, Crate 'N Barrell and REI. Fuck yeah we put a canoe on there! If someone's gonna give me a canoe, just because I'm gettin hitched to the best goddamn girl in the world, then by god I'm gonna let em.

I can picture myself, Emily and our newborn babe lunching on the lake in the shade of a willow tree. The babe is suckling his mother's white breast in the cool air of a hot days heat. I, munching on chips and swigging a pale ale, looking at the marvelous bugs on the limb in front of my face. I ask Emily if she knows what kind of bugs they are and what their mating characteristics are (she knows alot about this shit). She, giving me her look as she smiles the smile that goes along with that look, contents herself with holding the child in front of her face and kissing his eyes. We lunch on lentils and kool-aid and love the love that love's the love that love's the love that love's the love.

Go right now to REI and make this scene a reality. Help promote family and nature and love, all at the same time. Can all of your clamoring about Bush and the Republican's and the defense budget really compare to this? Spend your tips wisely. Go into debt just a little more. Give to the American Dream.

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There are alot of Jason Lees' getting married. What the hell? I put in my name to get to our registry and there are a gazizillion number of Jason Lees' signed up. So I started looking at their registries. Some poor couple got married in November of 2004 and nobody got them shit! Then another couple from '04 got almost everything on their list.

Well I have half a mind to go buy something for that poor schmuck, Jason Lee, who didn't have any friends decent enough to even buy him an espresso square plate! what the hell? Somebody already got us a vacuum food sealer , a four slice toaster and the spicy salsa pillow. I'm already happy with that!

I wouldn't mind the type of furniture that Bethany and Fred got for their wedding. Although I don't know if people are man enough to do it again. Are ya? Huh? Huh? Are ya?

Word.