Sunday, July 31, 2005

This is Sooo Adam R.

Adam called me on Friday night so I could help him look up a cheap airline ticket to Baltimore. He doesn't have internest access at his apartment and figured it would be quicker to call me than to wait the 10 minutes hold time for the airline. 15 minutes later, I still had not located him a good rate to Baltimore.

Funny thing is, Adam, rather than flying to Baltimore, was suppose to be going on a date with this girl he's had a crush on for five years. He describes her sexiness in many different ways.

He also realized that Jeff and Russ were coming over on Saturday and that it might be weird for them to show up at his apartment and find him missing.

I'm not sure if Adam was drunk or not, but he wasn't at work, so odds are he was sober . . . or at least hung over.

Incidentally, I had friends over from Baltimore last night. Hmmmmm.

Saturday, July 30, 2005

Do we sense a theme?


who's drunk? Posted by Picasa

Friday, July 29, 2005

Speaking of Nipples

Contributor implies contributing so...

I play fantasy golf. Yup thats right. It's just like Dungeons and Dragons. You are assigned a golfer each week and it is your job then to act, speak and golf like that golfer. It really sucks when you're assigned Chris Dimarco, what with that Big ass Butt of his and all.

Dick Pride is kinda fun to be but it get's old fast. But man, when you get assigned John Daly, it's the best. You just have to drink and smoke all day. And you have to play aggresively, like take your 0 iron from 260yds out and just try to stick it on the green. David Duval is the easiest to mimick on the golf course however.

I'm kidding about the Dungeons and Dragons similarities. I do however play fantasy golf. Three different kinds actually. I play Pick-a-Pro where you pick one pro every week. The amount of money your pro wins is how many points you win. You can pick each pro only one time. If you have the most points at the end of the season you win these...

Fantasy golf is a bit different. You get an allowance of $1,000,000 each week. You have to buy 5 golfers. Dick Pride usually costs about $75,000. Tiger Woods is always $300,000.

Not since Tecmo Super Bowl have I known so much about a Professional sport. I know Driving Ditances, GIR percentages and putts per green. I watch golf every weekend wondering how my teams are doing. It's made the sport so much fun.

Now that I'm thinking about it, it might be more fun to play Fantasy Golf the Dungeons and Dragons way, just so long as when I'm Phil Mickelson, you don't call me Phil Nippleson.

Havana, Oh Havana Posted by Picasa

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Clemens, Lee, Nipples

I was just looking at the stats for Major League Baseball. All sidled up to my desk with a big wad of grape Big League Chew in my cheek I looked over the Chicago Cubs pitching staff. Maddux is quite impressive. So is Zambrano. Leicester? Not quite, but I don't think he's found his groove yet. Dempster has had some good games and could be considered our number 3 pitcher.

Speaking of pitchers, have you seen Roger Clemens pitch this year? Damn! He pitches with a mission. Leading the league in ERA with a 1.46 average, Clemens has pitched 142 games allowing only 96 hits, 27 runs (23 earned) and 5 home runs. Roger is 42-years-old and this guy is HOT. Somebody slap him with a popsicle!(especially when they play the Cubs)

I must say, though, that Derreck Lee is my man! Not only is he my cousin, but he is having the best season of his career. He's been in the league 9 years and is putting up some numbers like he never has before. Leading the league with a batting average of .364 (career best of .282), he is tied for 1st as the home run leader with 32 yard balls (the most of his career) and is in 5th place for RBIs with 82. My other cousin from The Brewers, Carlos Lee, is right above him with 84 ribees.

Which reminds me when I was in high school. I played ball with this guy who had a red growth on the lower part of his ribs. It didn't seem that cruel to call him Triple Nipple. He really didn't seem to mind that much. I honestly don't remember the guy's name, but he used to like to eat sunflower seeds when we were both sitting on the bench(I was the backup catcher and occasionally used pinch hitter and pinch runner). He thought it made him look cool spitting all that shit out of his mouth. Me, I just ate them whole and got tired of them quickly. Never have been a big fan of sunflower seeds. Still, I always kinda liked Triple Nipple. He was a good guy . . . for somebody with three nipples.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

I Grok, Gorss

There are so many reasons to search with Grokker, not the least of which is to entertain your inner Heinleinian. Google might be better, but for now Grokker is more fun.

And for some reason, it seems more feminist.

Monday, July 25, 2005


Does anyone recognize where this is at? Posted by Picasa

The Baby Shower from God The Father Herself!


YOU ARE INVITED

To a Baby Shower!!!

My brother and sister-in-law are throwing us a baby shower in Maryland on Saturday, August the 13th. This has got to be one of the coolest baby showers ever! There will be beer pong and horseshoes and "baby shower bingo." Emily's parents and brothers and sisters will all be there.

You should come. Are you coming from Chicago?

Or perhaps Milwaukee? (Richmond isn't much farther from us than Raleigh).

Ithaca?

I'll be bringing a homebrewed Porter that is most delicious. Hopefully I'll have an I.P.A. ready as well. Hell, Benji and Bill oughta come just for that!

Did I mention there would be Beer Pong?

R.S.V.P. in the comment box or to my personal electronic mail account.

I love you.

Friday, July 15, 2005

West Virginia here we come

My wife and I leave this afternoon for a weekend music festival near Morganstown, West Virginia. Chief Troy was able to swing us free tickets and VIP status, so it should be an enjoyable and economical weekend. No bottles allowed, so cheap brews in a can are the ticket. It's how I like to roll.

During my absence, feel free to use this space however you might see fit.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

The H was O

I was over at the H was O--the blog formerly known as the H is O--and was browsing around as I do every now and again. Honestly it's been a few months since I've been over there, but I was deeply humored, as I always am by the H was/is O and excited about their creativity. God this blog is hilarious! I've always wondered to myself what my connection is to the creators of The H was O. Is it just a tenuous relation brought on by Adam Kotsko's Weblog and Robinstein's The Pickle. I always thought so . . . until I noticed The Tarantular Chief Jason was on The H was O's blogroll. I was shocked and surprised and . . . well, pleased (I was similarly surprised just the other day when I found The Tarantular blogrolled over at a house falling in the sea). This leads me to believe that my connections with The H was O are more than tenuos, more than just happenstance. This runs deeper.

Or perhaps The H was O just wanted to extend a hand of friendship out to lousy ole chiefjason. All I have to say is

You guys are Great!!!

I feel like I have new friends popping up all over the place.

Thus, I shake hands with The H was O. Now we are friends.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Who is Chief Jason?

After a long stint of blogging out of sheer obligation, I've recently been enjoying the interactions with fellow bloggers Cap'n Pete, Adam R., the green Wuxiruss and freshly-back-on-the-scene Jared Sinclair. Sinclair's most recent post made be laugh quite a bit, especially since I didn't realize chiefjason was such a mystery.

At any rate, it's nice to feel good about my immediate blogosphere of influence these days, as well as a little guilty about going to bed an hour and a half later than I wanted to. Yes, it's nice to feel a little guilty.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

The Cubs Suck

The Brewers rule.


Update: The Cubs and the Brewers suck.

-chiefjason

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

My Weekly Post

I went to a show at The Brewery down by NC State with Emily and her friend last Saturday night. The headlining band was Silvertide--who we did not stay to see (although the lead singer commented on my chops as we made our way to the car. I thougth that was nice and kind of wanted to watch them play afterall. Alas, late and drunken and pregnancy).

The opening act was a local band called Bombbox. They were a four piece act that played some catchy candy rock tunes along the lines of third eye blind. The lead singer had some sweet vocals with a nice upper range while their bass player laid down some impressive bass lines. The guitar work was catchy, simple, not overdone. The drummer was off beat at times.

They were followed by a band called Oliver Black. My least favorite band of the night, Oliver's lead singer ruined it for me. She was a shorter, rounder version of Britney Spears, singing like Joan Jett and seemed to be experiencing a combination of whiskey and speed. Seriously, she could whale some vocals, but her stage presence was just too much. Very annoying. I personally think she has some deep seated psychological issues.

The band that I came to see did not fail to impress. Pepper's Ghost. Their songs are melodic with nice guitar work and very cool harmonies. Based out of Philly, these guys know how to put on a good show. Their stage presence harkens back to the showmanship of the Stones and the Beatles. Straight up, good feelin' rock 'n roll and not ashamed of it. Check out their website here.

The Brewery is a very small venue and they like to play it loud. My ears were ringing for the next day and a half. The fact that they offered Pabst Blue Ribbon in a can really made the night for me. I feel good drinking a PBR or six.

Word.
 
 
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